It's hard out here for a pimp!

Sorry title doesn't fit I just heard the song and it kind of amuses me that it won an Oscar, because it probably wasn't even the best song on it's album. Anyways, the reason for this post is that sadly one of my prognostications has come to pruition. About three years ago I said that a team that Dirk Nowitski is the best player on will never win a championship. Dirk is a great player, don't get me wrong, but in crunch time he tends to disappear. This year, he was clutch and I thought to myself "He has really turned the corner this is not the same Dirk of three years ago". Again my thoughts were backed up by Dagromm when this discussion came up a few weeks ago, we agreed that he is not the soft jumpshooter that we remember from four or five years ago, this Dirk takes it to the rack and finishes strong. In the Phoenix series the new Dirk kind of went away and the outside shooter returned but Dirk shot 40+% with very soft defense being played on him. He then would take it to the hole with Tim "You can't see me" Thomas guarding him, and I would say man that is the Championship Dirk I have been seeing all year. But in the back of my mind I would think I am not a Nowitness, this Dirk is being Avery forced and as soon as some D is played on him by a physical guy he is going to turn into old Dirk. Eff me twice, I was right. In the Miami series he returned, A Dirk that was afraid to take it to the hole with a guy in the middle, A soft jumpshooter. The Mavs need a superstar that will take it to the rack. Josh Howard is good, but much like Nowitski he is a second or third option. Jet at the point is OK, but Devinn Harris is a much better option, as he is a true point guard with some defensive skills. I was really impressed with the work that he did on Wade in this series. If given a player that would take the ball strong to the basket Devinn would have more assists and would have stats like Nash only much better defensve skills. Is this player in the NBA right now? I think that he is, and his name is Steve Francis. OK, OK, now that you have stopped laughing, Stevie Franchise would be easy to get from NY with his awful contract. He wants to be on a good team, He as an ability to score, my only problm with him is tht if paired with Dirk would he turn into a jump shooter like he did in Houston with Cutino Mobley. A sign and trade with Terry and throwing in expiring conract of KVH could net the Mavs Franchise and one of the Knicks draft picks. The knicks wod benefit with the dumping of a huge contract that they don't need, and getting Terry a guy who would love playing 2 guard in a shoot first system. Dirk would then become a second option and Howard a third giving the Mavs 3 good options and Possibly two guy who will drive the lane and one that is explosive like DWade, and sadly a Superstar that no matter how far he falls is still given the benefit by the refs in Francis. Just watch the last part of the season with the Knicks where Francis beat people of the dribble, threw up an awful shot and got the call. In closing kill me please, kill me; my Mavs are done and Dirk is a soft non-factor. Big Shan thanks for reminding me of my prediction of years gone by.

My Finals Minutes

Revolver in hand
I watched it unravel
A thump on the floor

How did it happen?
Mavs did not have A. Walker
Now he's got a ring

Wade is a biatch
Every call he recieves
Queesy's was no fowl

We can't wait til Mourning
A sign in Charlotte when Drafted
Now he's a champion

The mavs lost this game
They had so many chances
By fourteen they led

It was not to be
Mavs settled for long jump shots
Wade was just better

Mavs need an answer
The West was down this season
Suns get Amare

Therapy this is
My heart nearly exploded
I'll wait til next year

Two of seven ballgames,
Mavs have won hands down.
Three of seven ballgames,
Wade's Chance to spread renown.
When the Mavs get back home,
We'll have to wait and see.
Is the NBA against us,
From game five the answer be.

David Stern's a Giant Douchebag,
The Mavs a focus of his ire.
Stu Jackson's a Bigger Douchebag,
No more children he will sire.
Stack's suspension was unwarrented,
No precedence was set.
The play that happens on the hardwood,
Is no longer celebate.

What the F*ck I have been #@$!*%#$*$@

After 26 years of speaking my mind it has finally happened. What? You may ask. Well, I have been censored. On another blog here in the bogiverse I have had my comments deleted because of their content, and how it might affect whoever reads it. I can now say that I know how Larry Flint felt when they tried to force him to stop printing pictures of naked women in his magazine and using that one religious guys name in a parody article, or cartoon, or whatever it was I don't really remember and to be honest it is not that important. Anyways, I am heartbroke to see what I have to say go unread, and the fact that my comments will never get a chance to change someone's life, for better or worse, really leaves a fowl taste in my mouth. I would post my comments here for all to read but....I don't remember what I wrote, so eff me.


I still love you censorer.

The Last set of Haikus?

The game five screwing
Wade must be a superstar
Mavs got no chance

Twenty-Five freethrows
Wade shot that many alone
The NBA sucks

Star treatment abounds
Zero freethrows in the third
Mavs must have zero

David Stern's a bitch
Conspiracy is out there
Refs have to listen

I'm up on the ledge
Leaning off looking below
Mavs must get two more

Is the series over????????

Games 4 Haikus

Heat in a shocker
The Mavs were very stagnent
Where is Nowitski

My heart hit the floor
This game was just a killer
Gun to my Temple

A-Dub in junk time
Hoisting up meaningless threes
Running up the score

Life is now over
A 2 0 series lead blown
Step up to the ledge

Jumping an option
My confidence is shaken
Failure I can smell

Shaq is a Power
No Maverick can stop him
Damp is a pussy

Wades Bently is clean
The appolstry is spotless
The Mavs do good work

The series not done
Even a good game will do
No one said easy

New!!!! Game 3 limericks and Bonus

A team engineer, Mr Cuban,
Built a team for the Dallas Mavs Fan
A mistake in his thinking
Got tired of Don Nelson's tinkering
He said, "Nelly we've got a great severence plan."

The Mavs rely on Howard and Terry
Added Stackhouse and Failed bit Doug Christi
Let Fin go out of need
Warnings of Nash they did heed
Now they are West Champs with Nowitski

*Not a limerick*
Pat Riley's a great B-Ball Man
The Heat were built to his master plan
He traded for Shaq not Kobe
Dwayne Wade was picked number three
All he had to do next was oust Van Gundee

Game 3 Haikus

Mavs played like ass
Dwayne Wade went for Forty
Heat win by 2 points

The best of the Heat
Not so from the Mavericks
Only lose by two

Mavs win one of three?
NBA said no to sweep
Refs made it happen

Series prediction
AA Center will host Champs
Mavs win it in Six

Old GP won game
A-dub was a non-factor
The Heat were all Wade

Game 2 Haiku

Game two was a route
The Mavs were just plain better
A title awaits

Lackluster at best
Describes the Miami Heat
A TEAM they are not

The Glove's a phony
His skills are all degraded
Damn he looks ancient

Harris's quickness
Nowitski's unstoppable
The Heat are all done

2 0 series lead
Off to Miami we go
Games back in Dallas?

Mavs Game 1 Haiku

Mavs took game Uno
Tres more til they get Quatro
Just leave it to JET

Defense was they key
Open threes were defended
Mavs shut them down late

Quién es ése
ése es Dirk Nowitzki
él es alemán

Haiku - Antoine Walker

From blue grass he hails
By the Celts he was drafted
Shoots the three pointer

No defense he plays
Small forward his position
Looks like a cubric

He scores twelve per game
His bag is damn near empty
Shaq's little buddy

Its Haiku Time

This is my Dallas Mavericks NBA Finals Haikus.

Nowitski is key
Score and rebound to succeed
Udonis will fail

Jet Devinn and Josh
X factors to victory
Stackhouse get younger

Big Aristotle
It is on Diop and Dampier
Make the diesel crash

Lil Gen'ral has plans
Riley is overrated
Needs Showtime to win

Las Vegas says Mavs
Barkley and Kenny do too
I tend to agree

Mavs in four I hope
But seven games probably
Both teams are equal

Working...

After spending 4+ years in college, I expected that I would eventually have to get a job. Truth is that I got one earlier than I expected, when I was a sophomore in college. I have learned to enjoy the job a bit and try not to think of it as a job, but as more of time sink that my life has become intertwined. I have since graduated from college and started working on a master’s degree, still keeping the same place as my employer. Don’t get me wrong my employer is great, the job is fine, and the pay is good, but I can’t help but sit around and try to figure a way out.

From time to time when one has a minute or two they will sit back and reflect on recent happenings. Very rarely is there enough time to delve much farther than a week or two, or even get into these events too deeply. Here in lies my problem; I have the time to do this. In fact I have the time to do this without stopping after a couple of weeks. I even have enough time that I have reflected on my whole life trying to figure out where I went wrong. Then it hits me, like an out of control Mercedes that was racing a Porsche down a freeway and lost control, careening into the other lane and smacking into me head on, THIS JOB! This job that as a sophomore in college I got somewhat out of necessity, that for the past few years has allowed me to do so much in the way of my education. This job was the one thing that was really holding me back. You know kind of like that uncoordinated kid in elementary school that you are lucky enough to have on your team during one of those field days that had events like catching an egg on a spoon and what not. Don’t get me wrong, my job is fine, it serves its purpose. If in a mythical land I had to go find a job, I would in all likelihood choose this one if no others were available. My main problem is that I have tons of free time to sit and think what could I do if I did not have a job, but I am connected to this place I can’t leave even when there is nothing to do, all I can do is sit here.

That is where I am at now, trying to solve THE QUESTION. How can I get through life without ever having to work, still live comfortably, and do things that leave me with a sense of accomplishment? The only answer that I can come up with is to marry wealthy. This however is a lot harder than it appears. You have to meet a woman who is probably older, rich, not picky, and then for your own satisfaction, pretty. These women must have gone extinct with the saber tooth tiger because I have not found any. The other unfortunate issue that I have to deal with is when a woman like this is met would she even want to get married. The answer to that is probably not. She, much like me, realizes that she doesn’t want to get married and deal with all of the crap, the only reason to even get married would be for money. More than likely she has already done this once, so she doesn’t need the money and apparently doesn’t want to give the money that she has away. Those reasons combined with my lack of physique and endowment, really hamper my ability to bag a rich broad.

So I guess I will just sit here; waiting…

Super Funny Mavs SNL Parody

People you would like to meet

A question was brought up to me this weekend - Who are the people living or dead that you would like to meet. There are many people that I would list here, I will just put down a few with some reasoning. Dwight Yoakam, he just seems like a very interesting guy who would be a lot of fun to hang out with, and possibly the only man I would have relations with. Malcolm Jamal Warner, really just to see what "The Career Killer" is up to now. Jesus Christ, can't forget this guy possibly one of the most influential people in the history of the world. Julius Caesar and Napoleon when they are playing a game of risk against each other, this is just something I would just like to see. Mark Twain, I would have him read "The Celebrated Jumping Frog..." To me, one of my favorites and to hear it from him, read how he intended, would just be really cool. Wilt the Stilt and Jenna Jameson, only I would be watching behind a 2 way mirror; just, like to see if the legend is real. Seriously if he can't get it with Jenna it might raise some doubts. Lastly Kobe Bryant, for a game of one on one, I hear he is competitive and likes to drive it in pretty hard. I would like to see him dunk a ball over me, and then I would also like to commit a flagrant 2 foul on him. Michael Finley, Brent Barry, Tim Duncan, Tony Parker, Bruce Bowen, Manu Ginobili; I would play a game of 6 on 1 them against me except I would be wearing a suit made of razor blades and they would all be blind folded, the game would be powerball from American Gladiators. Come to think of it my team would also include Laser, Lazer, Spark, and Zapp. They would be standing on pillars to the side of the Hydrogen peroxide covered playing field with those cool guns that they had on AG's only they would shoot darts insteadof tennis balls. That is all for now.....

A Confession of Obsession.

To Whom it may Concern,

I would like to send my condolences to the affected parties, because I now know how far my obsession has gone. It started out in the fifth grade, athey were so pretty with their gigantic tongues and stenciled writing on the backside of that. The Nike Air Solo Flight 89 was my first venture away from skips and into the world of mainstream shoes. Just so we are clear Mid-Range Nikes are a gateway shoe that can lead to more hardcore shoes and anyone that tells you otherwise is in complete denial much like I was for much of my life. From that point I moved into the Converse Larry Johnson's, they were black with blue-green writing and react juice in the heal. I am not quite sure what react juice is but I know that it did not actually help you play basketball any better. Next came the era of the PUMP, I had a pair of the cross-trainers with the ERS in the heal. This was not that Hexalite bullshit, this was first rate, I actually don't believe that it gets any better than that particular shoe, except for the Nike Airforce 180 with the Nike version of the Pump. That pair of shoes I actually still have though sadly I can no longer wear a size 6.5. Then my shoe tastes broadened to the somewhat abnormal brands, asfar as Bonham, Texas was concerned, to Adidas, Saucony, and New Balance. I have had every year of Air Jordan from '88 til now, and every pair of Shaq Reebok PUMPs. My life, since that fateful birthday on the 18th of May 1988, has been an affair with one pair of shoes after another. Loving each one equally but never straying to far from any of the others. When I got my first job I was so excited because at that point my shoes would no longer be controlled by anyone I could get what I wanted no matter the cost. My first pair that I purchased? The Nike Air Max '96 Lime green and grey, still to this day the coolest colorway ever. I am writing this to help everyone that had the problem that I once lived with of keeping this 1200 lb. gorrilla in its cage, its impossible and once you set him free you will learn there are others like you. Your habit is no longer a disgrace but a hobby many people all over the world are consumed by the same flame and will gladly trade you a pair of vintage Huraches for the deadstock Mowabs you have stashed in your closet. Don't believe me just look.

If you can't make your mind up, We'll never get started

Just got done watching replays of last season's Coupling on BBC. Get ready for the next season it has to be getting close. Steve Nash was named the NBA's MVP this week which is a perfect example of white America taking over and forcing one of their own kind into prominence, I for one am appalled. Steve Nash is a one way player whose numbers are a product of the system that they run and the players around him, he plays zero defense and would have a hard time guarding me at the point. Man do I hate everyone of the San Antonio Spurs, those guys just piss me off, cocky assholes. Tim Duncan is possibly the lamest super star in the history of basketball. What happened to Charles Oakley man that guy was fun to watch, you never knew when he would explode. There is a funny knock under the dash of my car I wonder if it is a Gremlin, it is not real constant and only happens when I am listening to country music after 10 pm. I just acquired a reissue of the nike air max 97 in a new colorway, silver and white, can't wait to wear them just need good weather. I jogged/walked 5 miles in some new shoes yesterday, I don't recommend that my feet felt raw when I arrived back home. I normally walk/jog around a cemetery that is named for one of my ancestors who I am also named after, just thought that was neat. Is it just me or are cemeteries extremely arrousing. Congratulations if you made it this far. That is all for now. I love you all, especially you Summer and Karolina.

Super Recent Photos That Validate My Point

OK you asked for it. As recent as they get, if you still don't change your position you are still looking at Jessica Simpson as she was before Nick Lachey recreated the dropping of the atomic bomb, on her poor body. And those damn witches. As we say here in Texas on Ocho de Mayo Ashley es muy bonita.

Hey Jess what ya carrying in that bag?

Damn! she is trolltastic. Man she looks like her head is getting larger and larger each passing week. Also, I wonder what she is keeping in that enormous bag? Could it be the talent and stunning good looks that some evil witch took from her when she lost a bet and ended up sleeping with the lead singer of Maroon 5. Or, it could just be part of her constant evolution into a troll, they are of a larger build than normal humans and have more strength so they can carry much larger bags.

You Guys Are Still Crazy....